WARNING
OLD MAP POX
Highly contagious!
There is no known cure!
Infection is characterized by dizziness and sweaty palms
when reading old map catalogues.
This is often accompanied by apnea and lust.
Additional pathognomonic signs are:
loss of free wall space and a self-induced poverty.
When infected, do not see your doctor, but
seek aid from an antiquarian map dealer who,
while unable to effect a cure,
can provide symptomatic relief.
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